Questions Barbara Walters Might Ask Me

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Barbara Walters: Good evening. I’ve interviewed a lot of people in my lifetime but no one has ever made me shiver in my pantaloons as much as “Chris” of the nostalgic website and eBay store “Holy Idea Tees”. Chris, how are you doing today?

Chris: I’m good Barbara. Thanks for having me. 

BW: First things first, would you please take that ridiculous pizza hat off of your head?

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C: Oops, sorry. I work from home and am used to wearing this all day.

BW: That brings me to my first question: Why did you decide to leave Corporate America to work from home and pursue a dream of fame and fortune through the vintage T-shirt medium?

C: Well, it’s simple really. I hated working for “The Man”.  He (The Man) always had HIS best interests in mind. They were really stupid, boring ideas. Mine were better and more exciting. I got tired of doing things that only squelched my creativity. So… I quit. Now I get to do what I want while wearing a pizza hat all day. 

BW: You bring up your creativity, what are some of the things you do to feed that animal?

C: Not enough things honestly. I’ve spent the better part of two years building my store so I’d have a foundation to build upon. It isn’t until just now with over 1,800 vintage tees in my store that I feel like I have something to market. I would have been hitting the marketing/advertising side a lot more often but when you’re just one person trying to build something you have to prioritize. With that being said, you can expect a lot more activity from me on Instagram, Facebook and on my blog in the next month as I really try to build those avenues. I’m also toying with the idea of a YouTube channel.

BW: I see. So, you’ve had no one helping you? You’ve been doing this all on your own?

C: Well, that’s not entirely true. I have my business partner who also happens to be my beautiful wife who I go to for business advice and second opinions. She also handles all the shipping if and when I have to go out of town. She moonlights as a vintage T-shirt torso model as well so I get to take pictures of her in the vintage tees for the website from time to time.

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BW: Do you enjoy taking pictures of her torso?

C: Yes. Yes I do.

BW: Do you think that perhaps you enjoy it a little too much?

C: What do you mean?

BW: You know what I mean.

C: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I get you. Yes, I suppose I do. She has a very nice torso. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!

BW: HAHAHAHA!

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C: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

BW: HAHAHAHAHAHA *BEEEEEEEELLLLLLLCCCCH*…………..

C: ……………….

BW: Oops, sorry about that. I had a giant pastrami sandwich for lunch. It was delicious. It gave me a little indigestion. It was about this big.

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C: I’ve never had pastrami before. 

BW: It’s fantastic stuff. You should try it.

C: What the hell are we talking about? 

BW: I belched and everything got derailed after that. Let’s get back on track. So, your wife helps you, is there anyone else?

C: I have an assistant named Barb. She a nudist doll who identifies (in any number of unique ways) flaws that may be present on the tees in my eBay listings. She gets looked over quite a bit but she’s a very pivotal part of the team here at Holy Idea Tees.

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Barb pointing out a flaw

BW: I see. That’s very, uh… creative.

C: It’s an untraditional way to stick out in someones mind. No one else uses a tiny nudist doll to point out issues. 

BW: You’re right, I can’t say I’ve seen that before.

C: I also use more traditional methods to “stick” out. 

BW: What are you doing?

C: I’m putting all these high quality, weather resistant, die cut Holy Idea Tees stickers on my face.

BW: Aren’t those going to hurt when you pull them off?

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C: Well… I didn’t quite think that though.

BW: Do you need some help getting those off?

C: No. That’s okay they should come off fairly easilaaaaAAAAAAHHHHHAHHHHHHH….

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C: …….HHHHHHHHHAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

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BW: Wow. Those are some pretty high quality stickers. Where’d you get those?

C: From this place online called StickerApp. All you have to do is upload your image and within a couple days they’ll have as many stickers as you want delivered to your house. I put a Holy Idea Tees sticker with every vintage tee that’s purchased from my eBay store. My goal is to have a sticker on every car in the U.S. by next year. I’m about one trillionth of the way there.

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BW: What’s the name of that place again?

C: StickerApp. It’s like the word “Sticker” with “App” right behind it. StickerApp. Just don’t stick their stickers on your face. I think I’m going to have to go soak mine in some ice water.

BW: Okay, I appreciate you taking the time to let me ask you hard hitting questions. Sorry for belching pastrami leftovers in your face. Before you go to soak your face, let’s take a photo together.

C: Thanks Barbara, it’s been a pleasure.

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Totally unedited photo of Barbara Walters and me


Did  you know I was also interviewed by Diane Sawyer? You can read that interview by clicking here.

That Moment When You Realize Why You Named Your Business “Holy Idea Tees”

When I took the plunge to self-employment, I made a commitment to my friend: the God of the Universe, that I would tithe and/or donate a portion of my profits. I did not, however, make a solid commitment to any one particular group or person. I decided I wanted the decision to donate to be made for me via an overwhelming sense of (said in deep booming voice) “You should give this person or place money… NOW!! THEY NEED IT RIGHT NOW!!”

I told my buddy God several times over the course of self-employment that I would like to have revelations on where to distribute my tithes and donations. But, aside from filling the palms of a few homeless folks, there hadn’t really been one moment where I said to my brain, “I think the God of the Universe had something to do with this.”

Until last week.

I was on my way to mail a giant, antique barometer I’d sold on eBay for my dad. It required me to go to a speciality mail store to purchase bubble wrap and packing materials to preserve it on the journey to meet its new owner in New York.

On the car ride to the store, I was having a one-way (that’s usually the way it is) conversation with my main homey God. Now, I like to continually thank God for what he’s done for me. Some may call it “praying” but to me its just having a conversation in my brain. Something like:

“Hey God, thanks for my life. Its pretty awesome.”

Or:

“Hey God, thank you for giving someone the idea for Reese’s Pieces.”

Or:

“Hey! What up God? You know, I really appreciate the fact that all my organs are still functioning properly.”

Or something along those lines. At this moment though, I asked for some clarity on what to do with the tithe money that was burning a hole in my pocket. I didn’t like holding on to it and I was worrying (something I do quite a lot) I may be missing my “cues” to donate.

Upon arriving to the mail store, I used my rippling muscles to carry this giant barometer inside and told the girl behind the counter what needed to be done. She wrapped it with bubble wrap and I strategically placed wrapping materials around everything to keep the barometer safe.

Now, I’m an introvert. I don’t dislike talking to people, but I certainly don’t go out of my way to encourage it. To my initial dismay, this girl started asking me questions about the barometer which meant I had to talk. After a few minutes of this talking which I so initially dismayed over, she shared with me about her friend’s three-month-old baby who had just died the previous night from SIDS. She was desperate to leave work to be with her and the empty look behind her eyes I hadn’t noticed earlier suddenly revealed itself to me.

This devastated me. I couldn’t imagine losing a child. I suffered through depression in my daughters early years partly as a result of an overactive brain with a tendency to imagine horrible, gut-wrenching things.

“I want to help!” I thought, “But I didn’t know these people!? They don’t know me how can I….

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*BING*

I quickly remembered the request I had made to the Master of the Universe (No, not He-Man) only a few minutes earlier. Perhaps engaging with people more often would reveal more opportunities to show grace as I feel I have been shown by my God in my lifetime. Could this perhaps be the “Holy Idea” behind “Holy Idea Tees”?

Yes. Indeed, I think it is.

The girl had inquired to me about PayPal as a source to accept donations for the family. I guided her on how to do so and requested her to email me once the fund was set up and I would donate. A few hours later, that tithe that was burning a hole in my “pocket” was now with someone who needed it far worse than I did. Granted, it is but a small consolation to losing a child but I feel there was a reason behind it and the fact I could touch their lives with some grace amongst so much grief was really special to me.

When I became self-employed, I didn’t have overwhelming confidence in myself. I wasn’t sure that selling t-shirts on eBay was a legitimate career! I can sit here now though and begin to realize that a guy like me can quit his job to sell t-shirts on eBay and actually make a legitimate business out of it. The excitement behind these words stretches far beyond monetary gain however. I feel as though there is a purpose behind what I do. I revel in anticipation to discover who I may be able to bless with my tithe in the future. 

“Thank you God for revealing to me why I am doing what I’m doing. Oh… and thanks for my wives boobs. Boobs are cool. Good job God.”

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If you’d like to donate to the family who lost the baby then click right here.